Validation and Anticipation

We are way late for Frog's three year checkup. I have made the appointment multiple times, but there always ends up being a problem with his insurance right before it's time. When I scheduled this upcoming appointment we were fully prepared to walk away with a diagnosis of ADHD and high functioning ASD. We have chatted with his primary doctor about his severe hyperactivity during Monkey's visits and done lots of research about his behaviors.

About a month or so ago I ran across a post on Facebook by a woman talking about mouth breathing in children. It said that mouth breathing is not normal and needs to be evaluated by a specialist. Her extremely hyperactive child was seen by an ENT. After a sleep study he was diagnosed with sleep apnea and sinusitis. The child's tonsils and adenoids were removed, and they saw immediate changes in his behavior.

I shared the post, and then my mother-in-law read it and shared it two weeks later. We both thought the child sounded just like my son. We weren't the only ones. Frog has been in speech therapy for a few months. His speech therapist ran across the post weeks later and printed it to give to me. She suggested I give it to his doctor and ask for an ENT referral. SWEET VALIDATION! We weren't crazy, she saw him in that post too.

So we'll add that to the laundry list of things that need to be addressed at his appointment. It will go under the swallowing issues that cause him to regurgitate food and randomly vomit during dinner. It'll go after chronic constipation and a lip tie. It'll follow how he fixate on things and has severe meltdowns. The list goes on and on.

If you're confused because this is the first you are hearing about all this, I'm sorry. I don't like to talk about it. It's stressful and exhausting, and honestly the future looks sad to us. But also I've been busy. I've tried everything I can find to try to fix him. That's my job isn't it?

Frog is taking vitamins and probiotics. He's on a modified diet. We use detox baths and essential oils. I spend every day all day contemplating and comparing behaviors. I try to figure out what's working and what's not. I worry over everything that goes into his body and how it will effect him.

The other night he was crying in his sleep, which isn't really typical for him. It's a new thing...they just keep piling on. By the time I got to the bedroom to check on him the crying had stopped, but I sat with him for a few minutes. He stopped breathing. Just, stopped, no big production or anything. He just failed to take a next breath.

I sat there watching him while my heart raced for about thirty seconds. I kept trying to convince myself that maybe he was breathing inaudibly or I couldn't see the movement for the blanket. He gasped for his next breath, and then he was fine like it had never happened. So maybe it is sleep apnea. I guess we'll know soon.

I want to go to the appointment and say, "Give me all the things!" I want them to do blood work and give us referrals for an ENT, a swallow study, and a sleep study. I want to talk to them about the early learning invention that his speech therapist recommended. I just want a plan that involves all the help they can give me to make him better before these things prevent him from starting school.

For now all we can do is wait.